It came from a PR person who was pitching me a new product – A shirt. Yes, a shirt. Nothing special about the shirt, it was simply a new style from a new designer. But here’s what gets me: The subject line of the email was: “Hi! Can I borrow your audience?”

(Insert blogging-car-skidding-to-a-halt sound here…)

Can you borrow my… Hold up… WHAT?

Can you “BORROW MY AUDIENCE?”

Are you serious?

OK. Not even taking into account the fact that my audience… IS AN AUDIENCE, and not, say, A SPATULA, no, you can’t “borrow my audience.”

Let’s understand something – My audience is the most important thing to me in my world, next to my wife and cat. I’ve spent YEARS and YEARS cultivating my audience. I’ve spent countless nights figuring out what my audience wants, how they want it, and what they’re going to want next. I’d take a bullet for my audience.

Without my audience, I have no business, I have no revenue, I have nothing.

My audience is my life. And you want to come over and “borrow it?” I don’t know you! Why don’t l let  Michael Milken “borrow” my AmEx while I’m at it? I’m sure it’ll be fine.

You can’t borrow my audience – But you CAN build one of your own. Here’s how:

1) Understand that having an audience is a privilege, not a right. I say this all the time, and I’m saying it again – It’s like wearing spandex. That too, is a privilege, not a right. We’re born as free people with certain unalienable rights, but guess what – Having a bunch of people who will listen to you and buy from you is NOT one of them. You have to EARN that. Once you accept that you don’t just “get” an audience, like Jewish kids get a Bar-Mitzvah when they turn 13, the quicker you’ll start to understand how to get one.

2) An audience is built over time, and on one simple premise: Give them what they want. Audiences today are mobile. They can go anywhere, anytime, by clicking a mouse or scrolling off your site. Want them to listen to you, or even more, buy from you? Give them what they want, how they want it. They on Facebook? Reach out to them there. They like emailing you? Email them back. And for God’s sake, do it from an email that’s real – Like yours. Not “donotreply@I’manidiot.com”

3) How do you find out where the audience is? ASK THEM. You have their information! Try this! Go to your fan page and ask the question – “Hey – How do you like to be contacted by us when we have a special for you?” Then actually read the answers and act accordingly! This isn’t rocket science.

4) Have content that your audience actually WANTS. You know what would happen if I let every journalist “borrow” my audience to promote their crap? I wouldn’t have an audience! Why? Because audiences like people to STAY ON TOPIC. Imagine going to see Bon Jovi, and Jon Bon Jovi comes out and talks about tax shelters all night, and never plays “Living on a Prayer.” Not really what I paid for. Stay on topic – Had you, dear PR person, pitched me on topic about something relevant to my audience, I might have talked about it!

5) Finally, for all that’s good and holy, know what I talk about. That you pitched me on fashion is like pitching Britney Spears on child-safety. The simple act of knowing your audience will get you 5x the good attention you’d otherwise not get. Simply do some homework. There’s no excuse not to.

My audience? No. You can’t borrow it. Go get your own.

8) Know your audience. This is one of the easiest, yet most forgotten things in customer service. Imagine being able to talk to your audience about things that relate directly to them when they walk into your store, or contact you for an order? It’s not hard. With the level of sharing we’re all subjected to on a daily basis, a simple Google alert on your best customers, or a perusal of a Twitter account should give you a basic insight into what’s up in their world. Mind you, I said a quick perusal. There’s a fine line between “taking an interest,” and “being the creepy stalker who works at Staples.”

7) Being early is a trait of those who excel in customer service. I had a car for 8am this morning. At 7:26am, I get a text that my Groundlink car is on the way, and at 7:39, I get another text that it’s downstairs waiting for me. 20 minutes early, just chilling. When I get downstairs at 7:50, the car is there, I’m calm, relaxed, without that “where the hell is he, I’m going to miss my flight” stress that we get when the time comes and there’s no car. Can you do the same? Can you deliver a project before deadline? Can you auto-upgrade shipping for your customers without charging them extra? Zappos does… Focus on ways to make things happen quicker.

6) Something unexpected. You know what was in my car when I got in this morning? A bottle of water. Simplest thing in the world. They probably buy them in bulk for $5 for 20 bottles. But it was there, and it was available to me, no charge. That little bottle of water made me so happy. I hydrated ,and felt just a little bit better when I arrived at JFK. Good luck getting a bottle of water in a taxi. What little things can you do? I bought a Keurig machine for my office/apartment, and some funky flavored coffees. People actually ask to have meetings at my apartment because they never know what kind of cool coffee they’re going to get. I once knew a CEO who went to Africa each year to bring back 30 pounds of a specific type of coffee bean, but he never told anyone where they could get it. His reasoning? “Maybe they remember where they had the great coffee, and maybe they come back for more, and maybe we do some business.” (Say that in a Yiddish accent, it sounds much funnier.) But he was right. What unexpected things can you do?

5) Stop nickel and diming. Airlines are terrible at this. They quote you a fare of like, $99 dollars to go somewhere, right? But then, that’s each way, and that doesn’t include taxes, tariffs, boarding fees, baggage fees, lubrication fees (for the TSA Anal Probes) and other fees. Total on a $198 round trip? $445.50. How is that good customer service? It’s not. What can you include for no additional cost? Batteries? Ink? Toner? Spare parts? Free transfers? What can you include and call it “a good karma inclusion” or something like that?

4) Can you help someone in a way that’s out of the ordinary? We all know what Morton’s did for me last summer… But what else can you do? I’ve heard stories of restaurants picking people up and driving them to their establishment when a customers’ car died. I’ve heard other stories of companies doing things completely random – A hotel in San Francisco called a hotel in NYC to get the bellman there to deliver flowers to a San Francisco guest’s wife who wasn’t feeling well in NYC. Remember: Simple things are expected. Amazing things get remembered.

3) Don’t be afraid to do something truly incredible! I once heard of a company that makes metal pipes – One of their corporate customers had come in to discuss a new order. While they were there, they mentioned to the owner that they had to take a trip overseas because their plant was having some kind of problem. Turns out, the metal pipe company also had a plant overseas, pretty close to the customer’s plant. The owner of the metal pipe company was able to send his technicians over to the customer’s company and fix the problem, saving the customer a $10,000 trip and a week of his life. How loyal do you think that customer is now?

2) Give your customers the tools to tell your story! There’s a restaurant in the mid-west that has an iPad attached to the bar by the take-out order station. When someone comes in to wait for their food, they’re offered a chance to play with the iPad for free. They’re also told that if they log onto Facebook and “like” the restaurant’s page, they’ll get a free appetizer, right then and there. The company then thanks each and every customer on Facebook, and asks how they like their appetizer. It’s a no-brainer, works so easily, and, perhaps most importantly, as Facebook starts to ramp up “Places” and “Offers,” Facebook will become the de facto standard for customer experience stories – Why wouldn’t you want to help facilitate growth and excitement when the customer is there, in your store, and willing to be talked to? Easiest thing in the world.

1) It has to start from the top down. CEOs can’t run a company from a corner office. It simply doesn’t work. For a company to truly embrace radical ways of handling customer service, the entire corporation has to get in on it. I’ve heard stories of CEOs driving to a customer’s home with a part or an order, because it came in after hours. I once heard of a CEO who happened to be in the building on a Saturday, and answered the phone – The call was a random customer complaining about something. The CEO took the call, and got a resolution in 20 minutes – On a Saturday! You know the customer told the world about that.

What can you do that’s different, over the top, and inexpensive? Let me know in the comments, and as always, thanks for reading. :)

I volunteered to give it a shot, even after being told there was no turning back – i.e., my “Fan page” would disappear, and I couldn’t bring it back.

After asking a ton of questions (and to Facebook’s credit, the person who reached out to me answered every single one, no matter how basic or stupid they seemed,) I told Facebook to flip the switch.

Within 24 hours, http://facebook.com/petershankman redirected to my personal page, and my “Fan page” was no more.

A little over a month later, here’s what I’ve learned from that transformation.

Overall, I’m happy with the change. There’s no doubt that it’s easier to update one page vs. two, and it’s most definitely easier to update Facebook via mobile, which, lets be honest, is where a decent amount of content happens. Before the merger, I’d have to email photos to a specific email address and hope they made it – I couldn’t tag or add location until I got back to a laptop. So there’s no doubt that being able to fully utilize the Facebook Droid App for all that it’s made to do (tagging, location, and privacy) is a big bonus.

Positives:

1) Probably the most important, the merger to one page means I’m more likely to post more quality content. I never truly realized the value of the Facebook App on my Droid until my pages were merged. Because there was no support for Fan Pages (yes, you could email to a private address, but nothing like what you can do with the app – tagging, location, etc.) I was more than likely to take a photo and Tweet it out, or save it to post on my fan page if I remembered later or the next day. In other words, if I was away from my laptop when I wanted to share content, those on my “fan page” got the short end of the stick. With the merged page, I have over 50,000 subscribers (formerly fans) in addition to my “friends” who now can see my content in real time, tagged and geo-tagged, as long as I make sure the content is public. As someone whose mantra is “having an audience is a privilege, not a right,” I can’t stress enough the power of this change: Facebook has taken away all the previous barriers that crippled my fan page when I was mobile, and I can truly offer my audience the best content I have, as it happens. At an event and spot a celeb? I can post and tag. At the airport with four hours to kill and want to offer anyone who knows me and happens to be there access to the airline lounge as my guest? Can do it in a heartbeat. The ability to use the mobile apps to share content and choose what level of sharing I want is definitely the best result of the new merged format.

2) Truly “owning” privacy, (to the extent anyone actually can on Facebook,) means I’m more aware of everything I post. Huh? “Of course you’re aware of it, Peter, you’re posting it!” Not quite. Think about it: You post a photo or a joke to your personal page – You can do it without thinking – “It’s my personal page, I can do whatever I want.” Posting to a fan page? Same logic applies in a different format: “My fans are a step removed from my “friends,” I can only post “this type” of content.” It’s an easy rule from both sides, and it’s easy to get into a rut with it. But there’s the problem: We’re lured into thinking in only one of two ways – “personal” or “fan.” That gets boring fast, and prevents you from engaging your audience anywhere near your full potential. Because I have to decide for who I’m posting every time I post on the merged page, I’m more likely to really think about my content. Does this content really matter to my fans? Am I just posting to show off or to hear my own voice? Will this be relevant to people who have never met me personally? All these questions come into play with every post I make, whether a status update, photo, video, or link. And while you might be thinking that it’s a pain in the ass, in fact, it’s the opposite – It makes me ask if what I’m sharing is really worth my audience’s time. And that’s how we should always be thinking about our voice: Putting our audience’s needs before ours.

Negatives:

There’s really only one negative that stands out, and I’ve learned how to compensate for it. When your pages are merged, and you have both “friends” and “subscribers,” only friends can post on your wall. On a fan page, any fan could start a conversation. With subscribers, only confirmed friends can. When I first noticed this, within 12 hours of the changeover, I was mortified – I emailed and asked why, and the answer was an obvious one, to avoid spam posts. I get it, but I was still concerned that I was stifling my audience’s ability to talk to me – to reach out and start a conversation. Over the next week or so, I realized that if you focus on figuring out the best way to communicate with your audience, them not being able to post on your wall isn’t that important. I do hope Facebook changes their logic here and lets subscribers post like they could before as fans. Even if it means you have to scrub spam daily, I think it’s worth it. But until that happens, I’ve learned that as long as I give my subscribers the ability to comment on all my content I make public, then my audience doesn’t feel stifled. I also ask probing questions that people want to answer in the comments – Anything from asking about their evening plans to asking if anyone has great images of their last vacation.

To make up for the lack of wall interaction on the part of subscribers, it does mean I have to post a bit more – But that’s not a bad thing, if you post with your audience in mind. I also believe that Facebook will offer the option for subscribers to post on walls of “merged” pages soon enough – I don’t see a downside to it. They can already do it on fan pages, and Facebook’s spam algorithms are certainly decent enough. So I think that’s just a matter of time.

Is the merge right for every brand out there?

No. The fact is, there are tons of large companies who have several people who manage their online brand, or are too big to be associated with one person. Any large company comes to mind – A car company – Any national or international brand – You get the idea. They need to keep their “fan” pages as they are. They’re a true “Brand.”

I think the problem is that with the advent of Social Media, everyone thinks they’re a “brand.” And in some sense, they are. But in the sense of a “fan page,” Facebook is right in making this change. A “Brand” of a person, a celebrity, or the like, should be “them.” A “fan page” is a misnomer – It should be a page about them – One page, they can adjust to make public the content they want public, and private the content they want private. Much like in real life, if you think about it. And that’s smart. So for every brand? No. For most people/celebrities/public figures who have “fan pages?” Yes. It’s time to convert.

End result:

Am I happy I made the change? Yes. The ability to post all my content to one place and decide on the fly who gets to see it in real time is a lifesaver – and I’ve definitely noticed my interaction and engagement from subscribers is higher now than when they were just fans on the “fan page.” Remember this, too: I’ve always said that it’s only a matter of time until the line between our “personal” and “professional” brand goes away, and it’ll be up to us to choose what gets posted in our world. I think this is another step towards that happening for those who aren’t “corporations,” but rather, who live in that mixture between who they are, and the professional brand they’re trying to cultivate. Facebook’s merger option should help anyone in that space, and as long as we’re smart enough to realize we should be there, this is a benefit, no doubt.

Thoughts? Comments? As always, I want to hear them. Leave them below. And by the way – If you’re not a subscriber to me on Facebook, you can fix that here.

I responded that today, after an awesome win, I think everyone in NYC considers the Giants “theirs,” and more importantly, is that really the most important thing for them to worry about in their busy day?

To which I get this vitriolic reply, stating that I’m completely full of shit, and that I’m nothing but a braggart, who should learn to be nicer to people. Me. I should learn to be nicer to other people. The guy who invites anyone to ask me any question, anytime, about anything. Me. I should be nicer to people because some idiot told me that I’m a terrible person for calling them “My Giants.” OK.

Funny thing was, that didn’t bother me so much as the way the person framed his reply. He started with this: “Well, I have two degrees in Psychology, and I can tell you that…”

That right there pretty much caused me to tune him out. (Well that and two other things: His AOL address (I know it shouldn’t matter, but we all know it does,) and his signature file, which included his mobile number, and next to it, the words “Don’t ever text me.”) That’s fine. Between your “no texting” rule and your AOL address, 1991 called, they want you back. Go hang out with C+C Music Factory while you’re at it.

Look – I usually spend most my time explaining that our lives should be primarily about helping other people. More specifically, I suggest that if we help other people, then any self-promotion we do becomes more about “helping” and less about “self-promotion, and that’s beneficial to us. And I stand by that.

But – The problem comes when someone tries to use “help” as a way to just start shit, which is exactly what Mr. “2 degrees and don’t text me” did. His whole email to me was based on him “helping me” “I’m trying to help you better yourself.” Specifically, he informed me that (his words now) no one who reads the HARO cares where you are or that you’re wiping your ass.” So in his 2-degree mind, he probably honestly believed that he was doing me a benefit by insulting me and telling me that every way I run the HARO was in fact, wrong. Never mind the fact that I’ve built HARO into a multi-million dollar business, helped thousands of businesses grow, and made thousands of friends, colleagues, and acquaintances along the way – Because 2-degree man thought I was pompous, then of course, I must be, and every single one of you who consider yourselves my friend, is 100% wrong. Shame on you.

So I offer you this: Help, when asked for, is a benefit, a great thing, and can allow you to not only grow your business, but increase your positive brand, increase your revenues, bring you new clients, and yes, even help friends out. But – When it’s not asked for, and you present it like the way our friend did above, chances are pretty high that you’re going to look like a douche.

You’ll look like a douche if you offer non-asked for help in a douchey way, as well. Tell me that “no one cares when I wipe my ass” is something reserved for my wife to say to me, and maybe not even then. Want to help? Don’t be a douche. Be nice. Or, if someone really pisses you off that much, simply ignore them! What could you possibly expect to get out of “helping” me the way you did this morning? Did you think I’d thank you for your attempt, after telling me how much I piss you off? If we were friends for years? Sure – Go for it. Tell me to change – I’d appreciate that. But here’s the thing: I have no idea who this guy is. For that matter, I don’t know if he’s male or female, because he has an AOL address (one name, no first or last name) and the signature file was too busy telling me “DON’T TEXT ME” for me to care.

I guess my point here is this: Wanting to help isn’t the same as criticizing. Until you know the difference, perhaps you shouldn’t offer? You’d think after two psychology degrees, one would – But hey… What do I know? I just spend all my time helping people the right way – Usually via text – And from a real email account.

Thoughts?

Example: In the 50s, you’d drive into a gas station, and four uniformed attendants would rush over, each handling a different chore, from checking your oil, to pumping your gas, to cleaning your windows, and other basic automobile tasks. It was simply what was done. Can you imagine that? Four guys, waiting for you to drive in, and actually running to service you? I was driving to Atlantic City last week to give a speech, and stopped in to get gas. Because New Jersey is one of the few states where it’s illegal for a driver to pump his own gas (anyone know the actual reason why? I don’t…) an attendant came over. While the gas was pumping, she actually squeegeed my front window clean, on her own, proactively! I was so shocked that I gave her a tip! I can’t remember that ever happening to me before. But in the 50s, it was standard. For countless reasons that are irrelevant to this story, standards have lowered. They’ve lowered by a lot. And with them, so have our expectations. Whether it be for a multimillion dollar corporate buy on which we sign off, or for a salad where all we ask is for the dressing to be on the side, our expectations have dropped along with the standards for customer service. The worst part, without question, is that they’ve dropped to levels well below “ok” or “fair” or “average.” Our typical expectation for a customer service transaction starts at “poor,” and if we’re lucky, ends at “fair.”

It’s simply what we’ve become as a society. And yet, wonderfully, that’s actually good news for all of us reading this post!

See, since we have such low expectations of customer service, (and I know I’ve said this before, but it’s worth repeating…) It’s so incredibly easy to blow each and every one of your customers’ minds, and shock them into 100% loyalty, every single time you’re given the chance! All you have to do is simply treat each customer one level above “crap.” Amazingly, you don’t even have to be anywhere near “great, “awesome,” or “outstanding” to be different than the norm.  To be thought of as “good,” we just need to treat our customers one level above the normal expectation of crap. That’s it. Anything we do that goes above and beyond “one level above crap,” is so rare, and so unexpected, that if you do that, you can rule the world.

With that said, imagine my surprise tonight when I got an email from John Korff, the President of Korff Enterprises, otherwise know as the guy who runs the company that puts on the wildly popular New York City Triathlon every summer. John’s been producing this race since the very beginning, well over ten years ago, when it was ever so small – Now, it’s one of the yearly crown jewels of the NYC sports world, right up there with the NYC Marathon, and as of this coming August, the NYC Ironman Triathlon.

At first, I assumed it was a form letter, since I’d been accepted into my 8th NYC Triathlon, coming up this July. (Why so many? Because I’m an idiot who never learns, but that’s not the point.)

I double-clicked to find an actual email, from John himself, congratulating me for getting in again this year, and thanking me for doing my eighth one!

I was still pretty sure it was a form letter – CRM software can easily know those things – But I still thought it was a nice touch. Either way, I happened to be sitting in front of my computer when it came in, so I dropped a reply back almost immediately to John, thanking him for the note, and letting him know that I was also doing the NYC Ironman the next month. Didn’t expect a reply, since I still kinda thought it was an auto-email.

Two minutes later – “Wow, Peter – Both! You know, we call those who do the NYC Triathlon then the Ironman the next month “Hudson Doublers!”

So it actually was him. At 6:55pm on a Tuesday night.

What made him email me? Was he looking for repeat “customers,” as it were? Those who’ve done his race more than once? If so, smart – Remember – it’s not cheap to race these races – Perhaps he realized that and wanted to let us know that our continued support of what he built hasn’t gone unnoticed. Perhaps he’s just that nice of a guy – Perhaps it was all planned out on a spreadsheet, and it was just my time to get that email?

It doesn’t matter. I’ve run a TON of races, all over the place, and this is the first time that any race director reached out to thank me, unprovoked, on his own. You can damn well bet I’m going to race his race every year, as long as my body will let me.

It’s those little things – What’s an email? It’s not a steak at an airport (not that there’s anything wrong with that, either) – But ironically, I think that’s the problem – That’s where the disconnect lies for the majority of businesses:

We’re tricked into believing that the best customer service can ONLY be achieved by these massive, over-the-top acts of grandeur – The airport steak – the “we’ll replace your car” – The types of customer service events that make the evening news and get blogged about.

THAT IS WRONG!

I offer you this: (shrunk, for your Tweeting ease:) The best acts of customer service are the tiny things that reinforce the customer’s loyalty. They can be done daily, usually without any cost, and can foster customer retention, increase customer satisfaction, and yes, even grow your customer base by increasing word of mouth, through social media and other platforms. In other words: If you focus on the little things, your company will benefit, customers and clients will increase, and most importantly, REVENUE WILL RISE.

Don’t stop trying to create that one “massive” customer service story that goes viral and winds up on CNN. Never stop trying to do that, because you never know when it might happen. BUT – Spend more time focusing on the little things – The “thank you” when the customer walks in. The unexpected “we’re glad you’re still with us” email. The phone call to your favorite customer, letting them know that you were reading some article, and it told you to think of your favorite customer then call them to thank them for being just that. (I LOVE this one, I’ve recommended it countless times.)

An old friend and colleague who used to be a journalist once told me this story. His first editor gave him one piece of advice: “Be brilliant at the basics.” He was right. Let’s focus on the basics first. You’ll be surprised how much of your marketing and PR your customers will do FOR you, once you master the basics, and come out one step above the norm.

As always, I’d love your thoughts below in the comments. Thanks for reading! :)