I was going to call this article “All “Social Media Experts” need to go die in a fire,” but I figured I should be nicer than that. But my title stands. If you call yourself a “Social Media Expert,” don’t even bother sending me your resume. No business in the world should want a “Social Media Expert” on their team. They shouldn’t want a guru, rock-star, or savant, either. If you have a “Social Media Expert” on your payroll, you’re wasting your money. Being an expert in Social Media is like being an expert at taking the bread out of the refrigerator. You might be the best bread-taker-outer in the world, but you know what? The goal is to make [...]

When I boarded my flight Wednesday morning from Denver to Houston to connect to a flight to Asheville for my speech on Thursday, I tweeted out a question. I said “I’ve got roughly five hours in the air today. How can I help you? You’ve got 45 minutes to respond.” And people did! So briefly, here’s what people asked, and my answers: @andreahrizk said that she needs exposure about a shortage of interactive talent in the advertising industry, and included a link: http://imediaconnection.com/content/28737.asp – I think she has a point – Small interactive ad shops can’t offer the same “possibility of instant riches” that tech startups, whether they be in a basement or in the Google offices, can. As such, [...]

This post may or may not be NSFW, depending on your view of what “NSFW” is, which is the whole point of this freakin’ post. I was once in a long-term relationship with someone. We went out to dinner to meet two of her friends I’d never met before. About an hour into dinner, when everyone was loose and having a good time, and the male friend cracked a pretty ribald joke about sex. I thought it was hysterical, and had to counter. So I did, with the following: Two truck drivers are talking about a blown tire on the second trucker’s rig. The first one says “Hey, how’d you blow that tire?” The second one says “Oh, I ran [...]

A follower sent me a screen-grab Monday morning from the 7-Eleven fan page on Facebook, which I’ve posted below. Worst thing in the world? No. But should their social media person have thought twice before posting it? Yes. They’ve since deleted it, but people are still talking about it on their fan page. (Click on the image to expand.) 7-Eleven probably dodged a bullet since Monday happened to be a very active news day. But still, valuable lesson in here? On Facebook, you’re talking to a LOT of people. Make a joke to three people? Not too dangerous. To over 700,000 people? Someone is going to be offended. And people were. Big-time. When I use the term “short-bus” in a [...]

When I speak at conferences catering to small businesses, I usually show up an hour before the conference starts. I check in, but don’t pick up my own badge. Instead, I scan the badges already spread out, and grab someone else’s – usually someone who runs a small business. I’ve been Jon Michelson, Tyrese McHale, and my personal favorite, Gordon Brown (not that one), all of whom own small businesses, and all of whom are looking for the magic bullet that will convince them that social media actually works for them – will actually make them money, will actually help them sell product, and isn’t the next BS thing they hear about every day on the radio, on TV, and [...]