Ah, PR people. How I love you.

Today’s HARO had some very interesting queries – All from the same reporter – a woman named April Phules. Sometimes, she worked for a national magazine, while other times she worked for a TV station, and other times, a business magazine.

April Phules is one busy reporter.

She posted queries like this one:

3) Summary: Death via Matzoh
Name: April Phules (National TV Morning Show)
Category: Biotech and Healthcare
Email: query-72y@helpareporter.com
Media Outlet: National TV Morning Show
Deadline: 07:00 PM EST – 1 April
Query:
I need to speak to doctors or Rabbis to discuss the disturbing
trend of more and more people dying from eating too much Matzoh.
A recent study found that more people would prefer to actually
not eat for eight days, then eat Matzoh. I need to speak to
people familiar with this problem.

or this one

21) Summary: New Movie Tech: BEING IN THE MOVIE
Name: April Phules (National Magazine)
Category: Entertainment and Media
Email: query-7cj@helpareporter.com
Media Outlet: National Magazine
Deadline: 07:00 PM EST – 1 April
Query:
Hollywood, not content with just 3-D, has apparently a new
technology set to unveil soon: BEING IN THE MOVIE. People can go
to a movie theater for of the movie of their choice and literally
be transported to the action in the film. There will be massive
disclaimers, though, since people may be hurt or, worse case
scenario, killed by the denizens of the movie. Will that dissuade
people?

But the one that got the most reaction by FAR, was this one:

Summary: Why don’t PR people listen?
Name: April Phules (Business Magazine)
Category: General
Email: query-7cc@helpareporter.com
Media Outlet: Business Magazine
Deadline: 07:00 PM EST – 1 April
Query:
I’m doing a story about PR people, and why they have a much lower
ability to listen or follow directions than regular people. Is
this something they’re born with, or something they learn once
getting into PR? All answers welcome.

We also had queries about men in Speedos, and the new Toyota “Screamer,” a new car that got amazing gas mileage because it didn’t have any brakes.

All of April Phules’ emails routed to us here at HARO, naturally.

With that, we’d like to share some of April’s best responses, and wish all of you a Happy April Fools’ Day. And yes, we were nice enough to mask some of the names and companies. Wouldn’t wanna get anyone fired.

Tony notes:

This is insulting, April. Is this stereotype any more acceptable than making a racist comment? Hardly.

There are good PR practitioners and flacks just like there are good journalists and hacks.

I’ve been practicing public relations for 24 years and one of the keys to my success has always been I’m a good listener.

Charles wanted to know where April got her information:

Just curious: What data are you operating on in regards to “PR people, and why they have a much lower ability to listen or follow directions than regular people”? I mean, is this something someone has actually studied, or is it your own opinion?

While over at an agency in San Francisco (on Market Street,) an over-zealous and under-caffeinated Account Director suggested that April talk to a branding company about how Toyota was handling the release of the “Screamer.”

For your upcoming story about Toyota and its new Screamer, please consider speaking with (REDACTED), founding partner of (REDACTED) Branding (www.(REDACTED.com), an integrated brand consultancy. REDACTED’s clients include major brands such as REDACTED. Best, REDACTED.

RS, from an unnamed Media company, has a definite answer about the Screamer:

The Toyota Screamer could destroy Toyota. However, targeting a younger audience who want to brag to their friends that they have a Screamer could triple sales. The key will be the selling price. It has to be affordable to people in their 20s.

So I guess RS thinks that only younger people should have a car without brakes. OK.

Back to the query on PR people:

Gini Dietrich of Arment Dietrich, Inc., thought it was funny – She’d just written a blog post on how Introverts make better listeners, and invited Ms. Phule to read it. That was nice of her.

Oh, we have plenty more – Enough for several blog posts – But we’ll leave it at this. Thanks for playing, everyone! Happy April First!