Hey Peter! So agree with you. I attended an event and someone introduced themselves to me after I spoke on mic (asking a question). They came up and said their name and that they wanted to meet me.

Okay?

So what does that mean and where do you go after that pause. I just said “great!” And then we stood there.

I know how to hold a conversation but if you approach me, I agree with you, you need to have something more than “hey, I wanted to me you.”

Thanks Peter for the post! Have a fab day!

Here’s another one:
Don’t give me your business card, unless I request it. I’d prefer a twitter handle or email I can put into my blackberry to begin developing a relationship (if interested) within a safe medium.

Maybe I’m dense, but I still have no idea what this person should have said to you. Should she have just not asked to meet you? Can you give an actual example of something that would have been good to say?

Hey Samantha – I would have said something like this:

“Peter, so good to meet you. I’m Michelle, I run XYZ company. I read your book and have a few questions – Is it ok if I email you sometime later this week?”

Or anything to break the ice.

Make sense?

Compliments go a longggggg wayyyyy. We all have egos whether we admit them or not :)

This goes with the “believe in what you’re saying” …but be sincere! Even if it’s awkward, at least be real. With a smile and sincerity – all will be ok! Thanks for the post Peter! With kindness, Elena

Asking a question would have been a great way to fill the gap and further the conversation. Asking people about themselves/the issue/their business, etc. puts the focus on the person you want to meet, also making the brief chat easier for any follow-up activities.

I think your comment to Samantha is the key. Some people want to meet you simply so they can say they did, drop your name later, or get a picture. These people are the Salehi’s of the world. Whatever.

Most people have some purpose in wanting to meet you… perhaps short term and perhaps long term. They need to balance that need with appropriateness of the moment. Someone going on, or coming off, stage is unlikely to be taking notes on what you’re saying… and probably does not have a lot of time to spare. Even if they do have time to spare coming off stage, it’s rude to the others in the queue to monopolize the person. So be brief (“I am so and so. I’d like to talk to you some time — not NOW — about .”), ask for a follow up (“Would you be interested in that? What’s the best way to set up a time to talk?”), and leave (“Thanks, Peter. I’ll do to follow up. I look forward to speaking with you.”) It’s easier to say than to do, but it’s not that difficult. Really.

+1 on the smile.

Great tips. I’m glad you mentioned the sincerity thing. I’ll add to it and say that many of us have very good BS detectors. Some people come to me very sincere, but I can feel that they are sincere only about making money. The selfishness will backfire on you. Instead, be sincere about your mission/purpose. And bring me a proposal about what you can do for ME, not visa-versa. Zig Ziglar said “You can get anything you want, if you help enough other people get what they want.”

Great, timely topic! It reminded me of another thought leader (Keith Ferazzi) who mastered the art of the 10 second intro when he was starting his career. In Keith’s book, “Never Eat Alone” he shares how (whenever possible) he’d do a little homework on certain people who would be attending conferences, networking events, etc. who he wanted to meet. He’d make sure when he introduced himself that he could discuss something relevant with them.

To David’s point, people love compliments and getting their ego stroked when you first meet them…just make it authentic. If I was to meet Peter Shankman this week, I’d introduce myself by saying, “Hi Peter. I’m Meredyth and I’m a digital experiential marketing strategist. I enjoyed your blog post about how to make a great introduction. It even gave me some ideas related to marathon running that may interest you. How about I email you next week?”

Smiling is great, but a smile without eye contact is just not going to cut it, so I’d humbly suggest to edit that ‘Smile!’ comment just that little bit.

I think the other thing I’d note is, try breaking the ice with a question! Use a question to build rapport – it’s a great way to get the person you’d like to speak with engaged in a conversation, rather than simply trapping them by blathering on.

I do know what you’re talking about, it was me that I believe you are referring to in this post. I’m smiling right now because I do have such a hard time with my introduction. I’m also happy I didn’t make the Things not to do list. I’m definitely going to find someone to practice with. Thanks for asking for clarification too Samantha and to Dan…sometimes you just want to meet someone to say nice job. I like what you do and learn a lot from what you say- Rock on Peter

Your articles are always a breath of fresh air ~ this time I just had to follow through and comment.
To add to the Please Don’ts ~ Please don’t tell me I look like someone famous…I’m working on it.

I’ve encountered some close talkers that were in desperate need of a breathmint. Always remember the following line from “Animal House” and hope that somebody doesn’t approach you with “Hi, Eric Stratton, rush chairman. Damn glad to meet you.”

I have encountered people who employ #4 A LOT! Having come from the entertainment industry (and living in L.A.), I am used to that. Along those lines, I would say to not talk or act like you have a ton of money. I had a “potential” client flaunt about the $650 bottle of wine he bought the other night. Then proceeded to ignore my follow-up calls after I sent him my proposal. Saw right through THAT act.

What’s you dream? I got asked this same question on the first day of my Master’s program. Then I had to write a Learning Agreement to follow that dream at least for an year. Things change when you put them in writing, especially when you reread them before you submit them to the aforementioned professor. Then you tend to reread them every few months or at least around Xmas when you think about your New Year Resolutions.

I remember back then, well it has been over 2 years now, no matter how hard it is for me to admit that, that my first sentence was – I want to be happy, at work, at home, with friends, in life.

If happiness in a particular moment means having money, then I want to be rich. If happiness in another moment means having friends & family around me, then I want to be surrounded with my people. If happiness means travelling, then I want to be on the road. And starting from the concept of happiness I pinned down everything that makes me happy, real happy.

Then, while I was presenting my “What makes you happy?” statement, one of my classmates asked: “Fine, but what do you want to become, there must be something specific that you fancy?” – “Yes, I do” I responded. While I was walking through the Boston Common that day I saw a cop on a horse and I dreamed to be in his spot. “Today I want to be a horse cop. Horses make me very happy.”

So let me rephrase the question: “What’s your dream for TODAY?”